The Chaos We Create

She’s lived in too many cities, dated too many men she never really wanted, and convinced herself she was in control. But when she lands in New York, she’s finally ready to stop pretending. To stop settling. To stop running from the truth she’s always known: she’s a lesbian.

Easier said than done. Because knowing you’re gay and actually being gay are two very different things—especially when the past still lingers. A stepfather who made her feel small. A history of chasing relationships that only reinforced her self-doubt. And a mother she lost too soon, leaving Scout to navigate love, grief, and identity on her own.

Between messy friendships, questionable decisions, and the constant tug of old habits, Scout realizes that reinvention isn’t the same as healing. The past lingers in ways she never expected, forcing her to ask: Who am I, when I’m no longer running?

Witty, raw, and deeply queer, The Chaos We Create is a novel about falling in love—both with someone else and with yourself. It’s for the late-bloomers, the overthinkers, and anyone who has ever wondered if they’re too messy to be loved. (Spoiler: you’re not.)